So much for good times at Smiling Cove Marina

ACTING Gov. Eloy S. Inos yesterday signed into law two local bills, one of which prohibits the hanging of clothes especially underwear in areas visible to passersby. House Local Bill 17-40 has been dubbed as the “panties bill” because its author Rep. Joseph M. Palacios said he introduced it after seeing underwear hanging on a balcony in the Garapan tourist district. Palacios, R-Saipan, said he saw how tourists shook their heads in disgust upon seeing the panties. This, he said, will surely chase away tourists.

In separate news, it is now a crime to have a sail on a local sailboat!

Looking forward to Arin Greenwood's new novel

Arin Greenwood has a new novel inspired by the Saipan lifestyle coming out called "Tropical Depression," and I am really looking forward to reading it. Arin is a great writer, a versed traveler and, most importantly, a genuinely nice person. I remember back when I was on the island I googled Bali one day and read something she wrote about it. (If you Google her you will find a diverse list of topics expatiated on.) Either the article or the bio tag mentioned she lived in Saipan, and while everyone seems to know everyone in Saipan, I don't think I had met her at the time. I was so happy to see such a raconteur living right on my little island that I emailed her and expressed that I would love to meet her. We got to be friends and had several great conversations over the years. She was one of those people that island people I thought cool like Zaldy Dandan, Mike Ernest and Galvin Guerrero really liked her as well.

As for the subject material, I can relate. Lots of us dream of going off to live on a tropical island. Some of us do it. It's not always what you think, it definitely doesn't suck, and there is usually no shortage of memorable stories and characters. My five years in Saipan are probably the most memorable, pivotal and happiest five years of my life -- despite the many problems there.

A while back Arin did share with me an early partial draft of her novel, which comes out in November, and I know I am looking forward to reading the full treatment. Even though I am not writing about or from Saipan these days, I would like to think this blog is still a valid resource to those interested in life in the CNMI. I still get the occasional email about prospects for living there. Arin's book will include a great take on the various missionaries, mercenaries and misfits that have had Saipan sand in their shoes I'm sure. I will update the Amazon link here as soon as it is available.

In the news again -- Ron Hodges

I walked into my local Barnes and Nobles, which nicely is just across the street, and was looking at the many new offerings when this book caught my eye. I knew there had to be a Saipan section, and sure enough there is. And wouldn't you know it, the principal source on that chapter was none other than persona non grata himself Ron Hodges, who is quoted rather extensively. The overall mood captures the depressed economic state of the CNMI, but some of it, there were several sources, was a bit exaggerated with suggestions that the place is especially violent playing up the Mafia angles and suggested there are hordes of people with broken thumbs and such from gambling debts. The book does a good job of explaining the depressed pricing of Saipan real estate, and it uses the staggering difference in the cost of building the Hotel Nikko and what it just sold for, it might have been hundreds of millions less I can't recall, to illustrate the point.

Small world

I bought a used tv from an older woman in a Phoenix suburb, and while chatting she asked me how long I've been in Arizona, which is a state about as full of transients as it gets, and I told her I just came from very far away. She asks where from, and I tell her Saipan, which results in the color in her face turning a whiter shade of pale. She relates that her father died there in the Battle of Saipan while serving in the U.S. Marine Corps.

A couple days later a colleague in my school system related living in Saipan in the fifties and seeing "black sea monsters" (divers in archaic dive getup) and playing in the WWII bomb craters. Small world really.
***
CNMI headlines real and possible:

GAO downplays Fitial’s economic disaster scenario

Fire blamed for distraction in world record fiddling attempt

The sun sets for me in Saipan

Saipan has been extraordinarily good to me. I met my wife here, saw the birth of my daughter here, adopted my two sons here and got a graduate degree here. I taught nearly 1,000 students. I visited Bali, Palau twice, the Philippines three times, Korea as well as Thailand. Those are all great memories. But just as it seemed, and was, a good move to come here five years ago, it seems the right time to move the family back to the states now. I'll miss friends, the small community feel of always seeing people you know, the beauty of the island and of course the diving. Thanks to everyone who checked in here and read and commented for the last year and a half, and thanks to lots of folks on Saipan, especially Brad Ruszala, who has been a friend since I got here and will continue to be a friend as last night he agreed to be the Godfather of Baby Ashley Lynn. I'm sure I'll blog again from this same place in the future with a different perspective. The pictures below really are Saipan for me.

I used to go to Sam's, now Wild Bill's, most Friday nights and check out the Big Beats, where I sometimes sang or sat in on bass.
I'll spend my last dives in Saipan in this spot over at Bird Island. The underwater world was a panacea for all the bad stuff in Saipan.

I would walk with Shelby on the beach path near Oleai. She would require some water in adjusting to this hot climate. How I miss that little dog.
The Mandi Spa was always a good respite to read and relax. I'll miss that place.

I almost bit the dust on a second caving trip, but it was an amazing experience exploring those caves and seeing those World War II artifacts.

This poor dog had a crooked head and was one of the saddest living things I've ever seen. I would feed him every day and he would come running as best he could when I got home from school.
I've always enjoyed taking the kids to World Resort for the water park.

I went on a few of those sunset cruises, but never quite enough given how spectacular they are.

I went cliff jumping, not all that high in Lau Lau, which has some beautiful water.


The view over at Bird Island is always impressive.

CUC Dandan as ground zero for Saipan gloom

I head to CUC in Dandan this afternoon to pay my ridiculous power bill. In the lobby is a giant group waiting to arrange a payment plan or to dispute the random billing practices of this incompetent cabal that's about as popular as a case of salmonella. Standing in the line leads to a type of chit chat I haven't experienced since camping out for concert tickets in college -- only a far more negative type of chat focused on comparative horror stories.

The guy in line behind me shows me his bill with water, but no electricity charge. I ask if he just had to shut off the electric completely, and he relates that he didn't, the meter reader just didn't bother checking the meter and he wasn't waiting around to get a sudden $1,000 electric bill. The contempt flew from his lips as he raged about "laziness."

The payment line, unlike the financing line, is not all that long, so I saunter up fairly quickly. The large woman behind the counter could not look more unhappy. In fact, instead of handing out suspended sentences, I urge our judges to render sentences based on days spent as a CUC bill collector. Being the public face of CUC is a cruel and unusual punishment the most sadistic goons from Saddam's torture camps couldn't dream up. I smile at her and express some empathy for her plight. She relates that she doesn't even listen to all the complaining anyway, though I'm pretty sure her look of distress was in part due to listening to the guy behind me complain about his non-read meter. In this situation, that glaring statement about "not listening" that violates most all customer service principles doesn't seem out of place or in any way unreasonable. It's doubtlessly not her fault that in fourteen hours I've had three two hour power outages. She's mostly just guilty by association.

Yes, the burden for this folly gets spread around. Politicians caved and artificially lowered the rates. CUC risk managers didn't manage any risk, as no one contemplated a future where $20 oil became $140 oil. Executives went on trips and collected per diems. People hired by CUC who knew nothing about their field were happy to get a check. No one was concerned, and it didn't seem to matter. But it always really matters because this place is in an economic and self-confidence death spiral with no end in sight, and CUC is ground zero.

Everything sucks, there is no gravity

I spent some time off island lately. I get back and see my latest CUC bill is $421 -- for a two bedroom apartment that we keep the hot water heater turned off in, and run one air conditioner not terribly often. As soon as the NBA Finals game came on today that my kids and I were eager to watch, immediate black out.

Yesterday I went and perused the We Love Saipan site for the first time in a while. Among the people who gave a testimonial on how much they love Saipan, here is who has left: Bev, Steve, EJ, Lauralynn, Bree and Melissa has resigned and leaves in September. Almost half. That's not a dig at those people. I don't blame them at all. This is an issue that is heavy on my mind as well. I'm just pointing out some of the good people we've lost. All contributed mightily to this place. The Garapan bars still haven't recovered from EJ's departure.

My family is visiting extended family in Singapore and the Philippines this summer to get away from this sinking ship for a while, but even that got screwed up as our return flight was washed away with Continental's decision to scrap the Saipan-Manila route. I can't imagine putting my baby on that Cape Air Flight from Guam. I hope there are other options. That prop-plane feels like riding in one of those remote control toy airplanes for kids, only less sturdy.

Governor Nero of course is in the paper today bemoaning the loss of "autonomy" again. Has he ever considered offering a plan on fixing the power plant, or can we just expect nothing out of him other than speeches where he blames the previous administration or begs the feds for money, even though we're "autonomous." The guy was Speaker of the House during the last term and has been governor two and a half years and still has no plan? Oh yeah, we have a PUC board to take the heat on the rates and more vague talk about privatization, as if businesses are dying to invest in us as we implode and pols change laws constantly to suit their re-election purposes. This runaway power and gas price situation is a blow we simply can't handle. Lots more businesses are going to fold. It's sad. It's even more sad that the business community spent all its influence on the wage/immigration fight and never insisted on making this power plant the big issue.

Even when we get a break, such as with this Marine Monument possibility, we screw it up. The same old ignorance is out there. Forget the millions of dollars that could be injected into our economy and good publicity for once because Joe Fisherman can't fish somewhere 300 miles away he would never be able to fish in anyway.

The way I see it, we're going to have Fitial around to do his fiddling for another year and a half. Someone else will run on the "beer and barbecue" and "I'll give you a frivolous job we can't afford" platform and take over. I don't see any evidence that anything is going to change for the better. It's no fun thinking about it, blogging about it or probably reading about it, but I was tired of seeing that Bateman pic at the top of my blog.

Wing Beach diving and other things

Let it not be said that I never changed a diaper. My five year old found this extremely amusing:

I am starting to get more into shore diving. The price at least can't be beat, and it's good exercise. I dove Wing Beach today with Mark Robertson, who took this picture. It was clear, calm and perfectly pleasant today. There isn't a permanent rope there yet, but Mark brought one. There are some triggerfish that are a bit territorial hanging out over there, so be mindful of those SOBS.

I'm also getting over my Grotto worries, as I did three dives there this week, the last with Saipan Bev, who is heading to Palau and then heading home for good. I also did a Lau Lau dive during the week - a place I'm a bit tired of diving. Scott Eck is going on vacation in late May and taking the Aquajet out of the water for several weeks, so I'm hoping to get in a Bonzai/Spotlight dive next weekend May 10 or 11 before he takes off. Leave a comment or send an email if interested in getting on that trip. There is also a lecture at American Memorial Park Monday night at 6:00 pm on Underwater Archaeology that looks fascinating.
***

There is a new gourmet shop next to Coffee Care where the old Wine Shop was located. I got some good quality Jasmine Tea over there, as well as some pate. They have some nice cheeses as well, and deli meat is said to be on the horizon. The place is worth checking out.

Ten thoughts on life of late -- not just baby stuff

1. My wife is just ten days removed from major baby surgery for the third and final time, and she's looking pretty hot to me already. Her diet and exercise habits are even worse than mine, but she somehow has this ability to bounce back.

2. I don't know if it's all babies, as I really don't know a damn thing about babies yet, but mine really eats a lot. So far she is actually pretty easy to deal with. She sleeps a lot, gets very red when upset, and really is only up one time each night.

3. Feeding a baby here is outrageous. It's at least $30 a week for formula, and we're only using formula as supplemental to breast feeding.

4. Having this baby has brought Cynthia and I even closer.

5. Even though she's a big baby, I still feel like I'm going to break her. She seems so fragile.

6. Leadership is essentially risk management. The OPEC president sees a possibility of oil at $200 per barrel. Our leadership is focused on the PUC board to shift the blame of the titanic increase on power that needs to occur. In short, they aren't managing the risk at all. Ed Propst is quite justified in his anger on his blog.

7. Ken Kramer wrote the best letter to the editor I've seen in a while. It's a funny and sarcastic look at the decision making process by the morons heading up this island and their latest fiasco, the idiotic anti-marine reserve resolution. Speaking of absurd, how I wish this marine park could include a chance for divers to get up there as Joe Cabrera imagines in a letter today, but there won't be any dive boats or fishing boats making that 300 mile trip under our runaway fuel costs.

8. There has been a week long respite, so now we have the fun over scrambling to buy fuel to keep the power on. School is a month delayed next year so expect a graffiti and vandalism supernova this summer, the movie theater has closed, $200 per barrel oil is being envisioned, which would translate to approximately $7.50 per gallon gas, the power is going up a lot along with everything else -- this will be a very different island next year -- one with a lot less people and a lot fewer familar faces.

9. I really have no use for soccer in general, but the men's and women's team put on a hell of a show. I didn't catch the women's game Saturday unfortunately, but I showed up on Sunday about midway to cheer on number nine and fourteen especially. I don't know if the CNMI coach heard me, but I yelled out as the game was locked at 2-2 for a while in the second half, "If you need someone to score, choose Ruszala." I was then informed by a friend that once removed a player can't return, and Ruszala played the first half. Didn't know that rule, and add one more reason I don't really dig soccer.

10. Between the soccer games and the Flametree Festival, Susupe was really rocking this weekend. It was almost like there was life and optimism for once.

Bonus: Bruce Bateman hasn't gotten his boat in the water since Harry's Ass steered it in August, he also hasn't been diving at all since God knows when, but he has found time to join a women's knitting and croshee society and no one has abused him about it yet on the blog. Did I mention he's been spending a lot of time with sailors as well.

Not a bad way to spend an afternoon/why I live here

I did two Grotto dives this afternoon -- the first ones in a very long time. Marty Dalsaso captured it with his wide angle lens. It was definitely not a bad way to spend a Saturday afternoon, and at a cost of only $4 bucks for tanks and probably three days of sore muscles from those stairs.

Will we still have a movie theater?

Beachboy Brad broke this story that our only movie theater is closing. I called them up to find out the story. I asked the person who answered the phone if there would be movies this weekend, and she said "maybe." I asked her if she could explain that, and she said "she's not at liberty to say" and told me the name of the manager to talk to, who naturally wasn't available. Something is going on, but it might not necessarily be the end. Zaldy told me the theater cancelled their advertising for the weekend. No one is confirming anything right now. Their website shows a gap and then something playing at the end of May. There is a lot of capital in that place to just write off. There hasn't been a big hit movie in a while, which might be a factor that along with our lousy, expensive power works to kill the place. My guess is that they don't completely vanish, but may open only on the weekends or something. That's just speculation. I've been to a few 4:00 pm shows over the years where I've been virtually the only one there. That has to be a money drainer. I would imagine the Indiana Jones movie next month creates some buzz. We'll see.

Superbowl parties

I heard a story that the NFL somehow is cracking down on the hotel Superbowl parties in Saipan, so we won't be seeing much of that this year. I don't know 100 percent that this is the case, but the person who told me said many people told him that was the case. I don't quite get that or how that is different from a sport's bar, but whatever. Doug Stanhope does a bit on how this is the most boring generation ever with everyone following the safe and responsible mantra awash in the corporate landscape. I tend to agree. Even this giant corporation, the NFL, is cutting down on people's fun -- needlessly.

I've only watched the game at a hotel once, and that was for the lousy game last year. I do know for sure that the NFL wouldn't let people purchase the online video system to watch the games. I have one for MLB, and it costs like $100 for virtually all the games for all the teams. I have had that service for years. I will look forward to not getting up at 4 am to watch football when I leave this place. The internet makes it a lot easier to be an expat with a 15 hour time difference and still waste incredible amounts of time watching sports.

Movies, sports, babies, delivery problems, gas prices, junkets and ESL

Lost returns next week. That should rule. Love that show. Bill Maher's show returned last week, but is a bit limited with the writer's strike still going on. The strike might effect the Lost season as well.

***
I'm a pretty big NFL and MLB fan, and in particular I've long been a Yankee and Cowboys fan. I kind of like the NBA, but the referees seem to influence the game too much and defer to stars to an extreme. I'm not sure Michael Jordan ever didn't get a foul called in a big spot. Both the teams I really care about had seasons that ended with utter disappointment, and that's been the case for a long time for those teams. The joy of following these teams seems kind of fleeting with the really lousy ending, yet I've often wondered why the movie industry doesn't take something from the realm of sports -- the element of surprise. That's what gets people to keep coming back.

Who would have thought the Giants would be headed to the Superbowl with three games on the road? Who saw a broken down Chargers team beating the Colts? If the Giants do somehow beat the Patriots, and lord I hope they do, it would be the biggest upset since Joe Namath's Jets upset Don Shula's Colts with Unitas as the back up until late in the game. The overwhelming majority of movies are completely predictable, and I think we're in as big a movie Dark Ages as we are a musical Dark Ages. The movies that most stick with me had surprise to them: The Usual Suspects, The Player, The Sixth Sense and Pulp Fiction come to mind.
***
Walking in a baby store, after 35 years on Earth without the need to do such a thing, or seeing a bassinet in your apartment, thanks Boni Gomez, to be filled soon is a really strange and nice feeling. In some ways, the fact that I'm about to be a father to a newborn still hasn't sunk in, despite my wife now being in her third trimester.
***
Blockbuster all of a sudden started charging my credit card if the movie isn't back on time. They say they will refund it, but it's still annoying. On the subject of annoying, I ordered Cynthia an ipod for Christmas from Circuit City, who sent it Fed Ex Smart Post, which doesn't deliver here. Two months since I ordered it and it isn't here. When I complained a few weeks ago, they told me it would come in through the post office. Sure doesn't seem that way. Wal Mart did the same with part of my order. The stuff sent the simple way through the post office arrived long ago. Why they had to complicate matters is beyond me and extremely annoying.
***
The price per barrel on oil dropped about 10 percent in a week as the U.S. economy continues to fall apart. If the reverse happened, Shell and Mobil would have raised their prices already. Let's see how long until they drop the gas price, or even if they do at all.
***
Lots of people talked to me about my last column. One person noted seeing government vehicles in the rally. Did anyone else see that? Given the nonsense going on, with Bill Weiss pointing out the CPA junket, I'm not sure if that even rates on the outrage scale.
***
PSS doesn't have ESL classes. I continue to have a large influx of Korean students with zero knowledge of English mixed into a class that is designed to get students ultimately ready for college level reading and writing. These students need ESL classes. I have no faith it will happen.

Forbidden Island amazes

I hiked down to Forbidden Island yesterday with Brad D., Angelo, my son Carl, E.J. and others. Brad D took some amazing photos. Forbidden is a spectacular place, and this was my first hike there in five years now of island living. Climbing back up was rough. I'll steal one of Brad's pics to get the point across on its beauty. Angelo wrote a nice description of this place as well. My lens fogged up and my pics didn't come out too hot. There is a funny video of Carl swimming and not getting too far in the current. We stayed in safe locations only.

This blog will be on a break for a week.

CNMI dive sites re-ranked

I'm re-ranking my list of my favorite dives in the CNMI to reflect my Rota experiences. This list can and will change over time and with my own further experience. I haven't done multiple dives at all these sites, so I might have caught a bad day in certain circumstances. The two sites I really want to do that I haven't yet are Goat Island and Forbidden Island. Of the three islands, I would say Saipan, Rota and Tinian are the islands I would dive in order. If seeking out an English speaking dive guide, I would recommend Richard Sikkel. For a Korean dive shop, and as a place to rent tanks, I recommend Mr. Lee at Dive Saipan/All American Divers.

1. The Grotto
2. Bonzai Cliff
3. Rota Hole
4. Wing Beach
5. Bird Island
6. Chinsen Mauru
7. Wing Arch
8. Spotlight Cave
9. Tinian Grotto
10. Lau Lau Bay
11. Emily the wreck formerly known as B-29
12. Ice Cream
13. Shoen Maru Rota
14. Fleming Wall Tinian
15. Twin Coral Tinian
16. Senhanom Wall Rota
17. Naftan
18. Dimple
19. Eagle Ray City
20. Tinian Dump Cove

Cinta Kaipat's loss is CNMI's loss, Marianas Variety 12

By Jeffrey C. Turbitt

A few years back when the idea for the austerity holiday came about, I was more aghast than usual by the latest government scheme. I did not know many of our elected leaders personally at that time, but I got the sense though her media statements that there was something different about then newly elected Congresswoman Cinta Kaipat, so I sent her an impassioned email about my concerns on the proposal. We ultimately did not agree, as she voted for the bill, but a friendship was forged. During her two year term, I sent her at least three or four more of those emails. Sometimes she agreed with me and brought my viewpoint out into the debate, sometimes she didn't, but she always tried to at least consider my and other people’s viewpoints. She just plain stood out to me as being more honest, more forthright and just plain caring more about doing the right thing than most of our elected leaders.

A few weeks back I was talking with some people who follow local politics closely, and they were skeptical of her chances for re-election. They turned out to be right. She didn’t campaign as well as she could have, and apparently she has been a thorn in the side of enough people eager to mine pozzolan on Pagan that it hurt her in this last election. But given the choice between backing a well financed, corporate interest, and the interest of the voiceless little guys from a poor, remote island, she chose the more difficult, less career enriching path of the little guy. That's what makes her different to me.

She also has taken a bit of a hit with the recently enacted labor bill that has become law and has her name on it. Business leaders have vehemently opposed it. Contract workers are opposed to it, and everyone else seems indifferent to it at best. One thing I do know about it is that Kaipat worked in the Department of Labor long enough to have some insight into those issues. The media reports I've read on the bill make me skeptical on it as well. My point is not to say that Kaipat was right about everything, or that everyone should agree with everything she did, but that she is great for this community, and it is sad and unfortunate that she is not returning to office.

With negative headlines and an absolutely depressed mindset island wide, she helped put this island on the right path by being one of the founders of Beautify CNMI, a group that has galvanized the community by cleaning up beaches, raising environmental awareness, our real bread and butter, and getting people to learn to take charge of our island without government assistance, which is a mindset that needed to be established. Those efforts were an influence on the creation of the We Love Saipan network, a CNMI website that offers a much more balanced view of these islands than was previously available online. Said website creator Walt F.J. Goodridge, “The We Love Saipan idea was firmly in the spirit and mood of activism that was kicked off by Beautify CNMI.”

Some of that influence could also be seen this weekend when the Marianas Dive group, a private organization trying to promote and improve the CNMI's underwater world as a tourist draw, had at least thirty members cleaning up Sugar Dock above and below water. Kaipat didn't do all these things of course, but she helped set the mood and change the mindset.

Those efforts weren't lost on PAWS President Katie Busenkell, who expressed heartfelt appreciation for Kaipat's role in animal welfare. "PAWS would like to thank her for lending a sympathetic ear and taking action to improve the quality of life for humans and animals alike. More specifically, we thank her for educating herself about animal-related problems and solutions, introducing the PAWS anti-cruelty bill and lobbying for its passage, for talking with us openly and honestly about building a shelter and available funding, and for helping us find a way to help others be more responsible pet owners. Perhaps most importantly, we thank her for acting in the best interest of the people of Saipan . She is a pillar in this community."

MINA Executive Director Angelo Villagomez was there with Kaipat from the beginning as one of the key figures in Beautify CNMI, and he had this reaction: "Cinta Kaipat IS Beautify CNMI. It was her vision, her idea, her name, and she's the one who recruited the first active members (everybody in the CNMI is a member, even if they don't know it yet). She's involved in every aspect of Beautify CNMI, from planning, to execution, and everywhere in between. She goes out every weekend and she participates. She picks up trash and she digs holes for trees. She's been a tremendous asset to the CNMI over the last two years. We've earned national recognition with the EPA and USDA under her leadership. I'm disappointed that she didn't win, but I'm sure it is just a bump in the road for her. She's still Cinta Kaipat. She was very successful when she was with labor, she was very successful in the legislature, and I'm sure she'll be successful with her next endeavor whatever it is. She'll continue to fight for the little guy, she'll continue to work with Beautify CNMI, and she'll continue to give back to the community in other ways."


Jeffrey C. Turbitt is the language arts department chairman at Saipan Southern High School, as well as an avid scuba diver and traveler. He offers more thoughts in his blog “Hypercritical Thoughts” at: www.turbittj.blogspot.com/ He welcomes feedback, tips and story ideas at turbittj@yahoo.com. His column appears regularly on Wednesdays.

Gear up and get wet already, MV 8

Editor's Note: All underwater photos are courtesy of Harry Blalock, who has thousands of amazing underwater photographs available here. Marianas Variety column 8.

By Jeffrey C. Turbitt

You meet at the dock in the sleepy haze of morning feeling that slow, inexorable march of the tropical sun warming the Earth. Stepping onto the boat you hear the buzzing of plans solidified between buddies, tanks clanking, gear being loaded and motors roaring. You soon find yourself gliding over slightly bumpy, luminescent tropical waters of azure. The birds are hovering – out on the prowl for their fish breakfast. A school of dolphins might on occasion be your escort to the day’s chosen reef. Land becomes more distant over the horizon. You prepare yourself mentally to make that transformation from land dwelling mammal to sea exploring adventurer. The John Stockton like assist of modern underwater gear makes this act simple, reliable and above all else: possible. There is a tenor of anticipation for that first moment below water -- that contrasting explosion of color, light and water coupled with that indelible feeling of water eradicating summer's constant companion -- sweat. This is a morning that doesn't happen in Brooklyn, Beijing or Berlin, it is a morning unique to the tropics on a dive boat -- a unique joy of living here in Saipan that allows a brief escape from all life's stress above water. Scuba diving is a pleasure that far too many people exclude themselves from due to simple intimidation and misplaced fears.

Sea Fans are perhaps my favorite coral. They grow on walls, which are a common place to go diving.

The typical dive boat lures a crowd of people who approach life with a certain zest for living, a “je voie de vivre” as the French say. Divers are generally more compelling people who typically don't while away their days in some neon vestibule doing some mind numbing drudgery before capping off their day with whatever bad television is on tap. These are people who generally have been places, seen and done things and have something to say. Being around other divers, particularly in an exotic diving Mecca like Palau but certainly here in Saipan as well, is invigorating and life affirming. A day on the water brings a certain relaxation and peace of mind that is hard to find elsewhere. There are no cell phone calls underwater, no honking horns, no interruptions – just pure tranquility of mind and spirit.

It doesn't take too long for divers to break the chops of other divers, which I consider a good sign. Bo, who I met on the dive boat in Palau, gives me the horns the day I met him during a surface interval.

To the unitiated, diving probably looks complicated with all that dive gear. That apprehension is iced with an irrational fear of sharks inspired by one too many Jaws movies. Scuba diving is shockingly uncomplicated actually. A dive course can be completed in a week, and while that doesn't make you a crackerjack diver just yet, it gets you started. There are only a few inviolate rules to diving such as make a slow, controlled ascent from the deep, do not hold your breath underwater and keep a close watch on your air supply and depth, which is limited to 130 feet for the recreational diver. There are only three pieces of gear the diver needs over the snorkeler, a regulator that ensures the right air supply, a buoyancy control device that helps hold the tank in place and helps provide proper buoyancy, particularly useful at the surface, and a weight belt to help the diver sink upon entry, which is sometimes integrated with the BCD. Diving opens a lot more opportunity to explore the underwater world over snorkeling.
This coral is only seen at night. Night dives in particular open up a world unavailable or hiding during the day.

Saipan in particular has some especially good diving. I've traveled to many places throughout Asia largely with diving on my mind, and our very own Grotto is perhaps the most unique dive site I've ever explored -- including many in the rightfully exalted Palau . There is a sharp contrast between light and dark with that blue enclosed backdrop that blends together creating a staggering underwater seascape. That combination of light and dark works in a way far better together than it could alone -- much like McCartney and Lennon are better together than alone or crispy bacon is far better with a thin pancake drenched in Maple Syrup.

One of the holes at the Grotto. I love that contrast between light and dark. Few things above water look this cool.
Mike Tripp is a licensed pharmacist, an underwater videographer who released a DVD called the Underwater World of Saipan and president of the newly formed Marianas Dive Group. The underwater world is what lured Tripp to Saipan and away from a more lucrative day job.

“To me if you have to wait to go on a dive vacation for that feeling of peace that diving instantly brings, then you’re, or at least I am, in trouble. What's more soothing then being immersed in a big warm pool? Had a really stressful day? Go for a dive, there's one only 15 minutes tops away from anywhere on the island. Here we are lucky because if you miss the boat, you can still jump in and get wet.”

Crusing around on a dive boat in Palau is a heck of a lot of fun. There is some great scenery.

Tripp even goes to drastic measures to be underwater when back home in his native Canada. “I remember trips home to visit my family in Vancouver. One particular house my parents had came with a pool. Rather than gear up in a dry-suit and drive hours to the nearest doable site, I’d sit at the bottom of the pool just breathing. In the winter I'd even put on my dry-suit, that's how desperate I was. If a week goes by where I'm not in the water it starts to get ugly!”

As a scuba instructor Tripp deals with the anxieties of novices. “Dive gear can still feel a little heavy for some on land sometimes, but once you're in the water, you're weightless. That's right, it's like walking on the moon. Not that I've ever walked on the moon, but that’s what they, who have, say about SCUBA. So even if it looks a little complicated, which it really is not, it's a lot less complicated than jumping in the space shuttle.”

A turtle is always a welcome sight. This turtle, among others, appears at the Grotto from time to time.

Divers might also get more of that moon feeling here in Saipan because driving to the Obyan and Lau Lau dive sites is a lot like driving on the moon with all the craters in the road. But getting to those sites is indeed worth the trouble

The next major hang-up to entry to this sport tends to be fear of sharks; a fear that Tripp notes is not particular based in reality. “By and large the types of sharks we see in these waters are the reef sharks, white tip, black and gray reef sharks. They are unlikely to swim anywhere near you and if you are lucky enough to see them close up, you'll quickly see they are quite happy to look at you and then get the hell out of there if you look like you want to get too close. It's also important to note that when it comes to shark attacks, they get a lot of media attention, but in fact they are extremely rare and as I say, always involve someone on the surface. I cannot go on record to say that there has never been an attack on a scuba diver during a regular dive (i.e. not a shark feeding experience) but if there has been one, I have not heard about it. Either way, it is much more likely you will be hit by a car crossing beach road a hundred times than diving a lifetime in these waters. They are amazing to see and well worth overcoming a fear Hollywood has created!” These little reef sharks aren't all that scary. Most sharks really aren't. I've seen these sharks at the Grotto many times.

With some of the common fears allayed, there is one reaction I hope people now have, get trained, gear up and get wet already.

Jeffrey C. Turbitt is the language arts department chairman at Saipan Southern High School, as well as an avid scuba diver and traveler. He offers more thoughts in his blog Hypercritical Thought at: www.turbittj.blogspot.com/ He welcomes feedback, tips and story ideas at turbittj@yahoo.com. His column appears regularly on Wednesdays.

Saipan dive sites ranked

After diving more in Tinian and Rota, I updated this list. It will continue to get updated.

Strangely enough given how close and easy it is, I did my first dive at Obyan this weekend, and this dive completes my tour of all the major dive sites in Saipan, which I'm going to rank VH1 style. I pretty much did Grotto Dive after Grotto dive for a long while, but I've now made it most everywhere since May, and I'm glad to have done so. The diving is probably the thing that keeps me calm when school and my kids get too taxing, and even better are dive trips to other locales that really rejuvenate. I'm hoping to get a group to dive in Rota on the Friday after Thanksgiving, which I've been wanting to do for a while.

I have been diving a lot of late with Rose Callier, who apparently isn't sunbathing topless at Wing Beach anymore since news of this event hit this blog and her Midwest conservatism kicked in like a doctor's tap on the knee. Neither of us were that familar with Obyan, so I placed a call to Axe Murderer Tours President Harry Blalock and he led a bunch of us, Brad Derksen, Mary McGee, Rose and I to this dive site, which I really, really loved.

I found it much better than Lau Lau, the other nearby easy dive, and thought Obyan had an even simpler entry that was not bad at all to my boat diving tastes. Obyan has great visibility, lots of different landscapes, and best of all, I didn't see this SOB triggerfish that viciously attacked Rose and I last weekend at Naftan. I've never seen an aggressive fish on the probably 300 dives I've done, but this sucker was hell bent on an Italian meal nipping Rose good, then me, then going for Bev's fin, though Bruce Bateman was apparently far too sour tasting as he was the only one completely unscathed in that group. During our surface interval Rose was joking about getting a fish std, but I informed her that lunch with Bruce Ruszala was probably a greater threat than this fish. Sorry Brad, I do break your chops even when you're not around. I know you're not too surprised



Naftan last week, also a first on my tour, was thoroughly lame in my opinion. Boyscout, the second dive was far more impressive with a coral bed that stretched almost endlessly, though there were shockingly few fish considering the massive amount of coral out there.

So, while I haven't done all these dives numerous times, I'm ranking them as I see them. I place a high value on visibility, strange and unusual sightings, and I'm not talking about Bateman hitting the water sans fins, I am talking about atypical sea life and an occasional change up by seeing something different like a turtle or an octopus. I am big on clear, blue water and cool and unusual underwater seascapes.

Here is my list of preferred Saipan dive locations in order:

1. The Grotto
2. Bonzai Cliff
3. Obyan
4. Wing Beach
5. Bird Island
6. Chinsen Mauru
7. Lau Lau
8. Spotlight Cave
9. Emily the wreck formerly known as B-29
10. Boy Scout
11. Ice Cream
12. Dimple
13. Naftan
14. Eagle Ray City

Casinos, not poker rooms, MV 3

In choosing a vacation location it only seems logical to go somewhere that offers something unavailable at home. Fortunately, the CNMI has something generally unavailable in Japan, Korea, Russia, China and elsewhere: warm weather, blue waters, first class golf and some very good scuba diving. We also have a few nice hotels, decent though hardly great restaurants and weak shopping -- though why anyone from a shopping Mecca like Tokyo wants to go shopping on vacation here eludes me. As the economic crisis drags on, many are looking to a casino as the lifeline, and the legality of one will be up for a vote in November. While a casino won't be a panacea to all the island's financial problems, it is more than sensible to establish casino gambling here in Saipan and actually follow through this time on a focused marketing campaign based on golf, water sports and casino gaming in a relaxed and convenient environment.

There are two main counterarguments I have heard to casino gambling; the negative impact a Saipan casino would have on the Tinian Dynasty, and the moralizing argument that there will be more local gambling addiction. Neither of these arguments is convincing.

The CNMI has gambling already via the Tinian Dynasty, and I'm sure Tinian folks fear a Saipan casino might take away from their fragile economy. The fact that the casino is in Tinian and not Saipan, the main tourist destination, is puzzling at best. Tinian and the Dynasty is hardly a resort location with the amenities typical to such a location. There aren't many restaurants or other entertainment options there, and it is somewhat difficult to get to. I can't imagine many people come to the Marianas expressly to gamble at the Tinian Dynasty, but they very well could and would come for a focused marketing campaign based on golf, diving and gambling. It helps to have something to do at night.

I can understand the concern of Tinian folks, but it is misdirected. A casino would draw more tourists to the Mariana Islands. It is not uncommon for people to visit more than one casino, so it doesn't seem unreasonable that a Saipan casino would bring more, not less, visitors to Tinian and the Tinian Dynasty. Beyond that, what is to stop Guam from establishing a casino that would be a "drag" on Tinian by the same logic? This region is unlikely to replace Macau as the gaming destination of Asia, but people like casinos and another tourist lure is hardly a bad thing. A rising tide lifts all boats and holding back competition is never a path to success.

The second counterargument is even worse, the moralizing argument, the idea we'll all become a bunch of degenerate gamblers. My understanding is that certain influential clergy members discouraged casino gambling when this issue came up previously, and that is the reason we don't have gaming to date. This isn't Rick's Cafe in Casablanca, and it isn't shocking. Gambling exists in the open in Saipan and it largely takes place in the dark, dingy poker rooms that lack the dignity of a Bangkok sex show, so the moralizing argument is absurd given that gambling in these poker rooms is the type that has wrecked more homes than Angelina Jolie.

No cash rich, high rolling tourist is ever going to be walking into any of these poker rooms that have all the charm of a trauma ward in Darfur and start plunking down their hard earned cash needed to infuse this dead economy. Casino resorts are a place for shows, restaurants, lights and "over the top" Vegas glitz. They need that type of atmosphere or they revert to the dark, seedy, scarcely populated, smoky hellish pits we have now that attract the wrong type of gamblers -- those who least can afford it.

I came to know this island as a tourist. Given a lot of time, I would probably have gone to a place like Koh Samui, Boracay or Bali -- cheaper and more exotic. Not all vacations are long -- especially if you work in a country with long hours and short vacations like Seoul or Tokyo. To get to those places requires a flight to Bangkok or Manila and then a connecting flight to your resort. A connection going in and out is ridiculous on a short trip, which is why I came here and why a lot of people come here, at least until the lack of flights made it so difficult. This place needs to aim for the shorter term tourists who want to be on the golf course or on the beach immediately, not waiting in a terminal annoyed after ten shoe checks and parched because of the insidious threat of water. Seoul and Tokyo don't have the gorgeous golf courses, beaches or diving we have, and the casinos in Seoul don't allow Korean citizens. It is a "foreigner" only activity over there, which makes sense. Naturally we do the opposite, offer the vile poker rooms for our majority impoverished population that prey on the desperate and financially unstable.

There is little doubt that a seven member gambling commission would be chock full of political cronies doing the bidding of whomever lines their pockets best. This is not just the CNMI way, this is the way of the world in 2007. Read up on the corporate giveaways in Iraq to get a full understanding. These commissioners will come up with some clever public relations campaign about the casino as a way toward scholarships or assistance to the poor for their power bills, which they've done previously. That stuff will of course be all BS, it's always about a few people getting rich, but times are so dire that this step of a casino needs to be taken, even with the dark shadow of a government that can't maintain a diesel engine in the power plant, can't keep blood in the hospital and I'm pretty sure can't make ice cubes even if spotted water, a tray and a freezer.

Editor's Note: Bruce Bateman and I ended up writing on the same topic this week. No, there wasn't any coordination. I'm happy with this one.

The $2.00 cappuccino is no more

The $2.00 cappuccino at Java Joes is no more. It is replaced by a $3 to $4 cappuccino. There are other price hikes on other beverages, though a quick glance at the menu shows the pain seems most aimed at my beloved Italian beverage. Rick told me the price on everything is just going up, even on things like napkins. Good things usually don't last, and his prices are still reasonable. I think this is his first price hike in a while, if not the first since opening. I'm encouraging Rick to add some decent sandwiches to the mix because Subway sucks and the San Vicente area needs some food that isn't chicken nuggets or Mr. Suave. I urged him to use the same high end sandwich meat as Bobby Cadillacs. Step up the pressure on Rick and demand sandwiches at Java Joes if you agree by posting in the comment section.

I myself am in the midst of my annual should I stay or should I go debate. I really like a lot of things here. I wrote about all those things in my first Marianas Variety column. I think it is a great place for the kids, especially with a baby on the way. It's a unique place. I like the beauty, the diving and the small town feel. The news at the hospital disturbs. Fitial's latest ploy to screw not just teachers, but everyone, with the no pay on holidays salary cut is another needle in the eye as he threatens the sanctity of contracts. I'm very tired of being threatened. No one knows when the house of cards just falls in and payroll is not met. Just cut the dead weight already. Fitial is doing some of that to be fair, but apparently not enough. Not all jobs are created equal. The power plant hasn't impacted me that much truth be told, but that is another issue with no solution in sight, as is the petty crime. I've heard one too many stories about people being burglarized while they were in their home. That's brazen.